Okay so to say I had some issues today would be putting it lightly. I had a rough ass day today. Rough as a torn up road. I contemplated deleting my blog, as I have done MANY times before, but as you see it still remains. Mostly because I can’t bear the thought of writing something and not having anyone to read it.

I can’t even go into all the reasons I had a shit day today, but I did. I didn’t eat anything all day and I only realized it just now, at midnight.

I have two “from the archives” posts sitting here on my desktop but I feel they are way too harsh and so on my desktop they will sit. The first one was something I wrote on Mother’s day. That was a bad day for me, just because I obviously have a bad thing going there but also just because I hate holidays now.

I don’t know what happened to me or why I feel so awful. I feel like the world is against me and no matter how many people tell me it isn’t true I’m like some anorexic looking in the mirror thinking I’m fat. What they say doesn’t break the surface, I see what I see and I’m just so sick of it.

I told myself I was done writing complainy ass things here but that’s not true, I’m in the mood to spout off some random shit so here I am.

I was so happy for a few days, I got internet, I decided to post some blogs I was unsure about, I made youtube videos, I was just feeling dandy. Now I’ve decided I want to hide from the world because everything makes me so damn sad.