I put 2 care bear bandaids on the arm of a 76 year old man.

I drank a sugar free Jones cream soda even though I decided yesterday that I didn’t like it.

I stole something.

I did something I was putting off.

I made a to-do list with at least one thing on it that I will NEVER do.

I sang in the car.

I walked around in a dark neighborhood that wasn’t mine.

I went into someones house when they weren’t home.

I had Panda Express for dinner (Chinese food) and it’s taking the express train outta my body!

Hello everyone. It’s Thursday night and I am blogging from my new papasan chair. Yes, papasan chair. You should say it, it’s fun. I got it from Target and it’s not exactly what I want but it’s like 1/10th of the price so it works for me. This is the kind of papasan I want:

But mine has less cushion and folds up nicely so I can hide it when papasan haters come over and I don’t want to admit to having love for the papasan. Doesn’t it look comfy though? It’s the dopest invention ever, besides toilet paper.

I’ve been working pretty hard the past few weeks with a day or so here and there sprinkled in where I do nothing but clean the toe jam out from between my finger-like toes. I love being busy, it’s the only way to be. I should have some good before and after pics for you this weekend, then you can see just how amazingly super-hero like I am.

The true sign of me being a super hero though would be if my damn eyebrows would grow back in properly. It is really irking me because I have these little spots where the hair just ain’t coming back. My eyebrows are thicker though which is good because it makes my head seem smaller, well maybe that’s just wishful thinking.

I took Kendel to her doctor today and he checked to see how she was doing and he said the baby will probably come within the week but that its hard to say; so in actuality he has no idea when the baby is coming. whatev!

Kendel and I have to drive around in the truck while Michael is at work and since there is only a radio in there I have been getting my fill of hip hop and fuzzy barely identifiable rock. I have a new favorite song and it’s pretty embarrassing but I’ll make a video with it soon so y’all can see how much I love it.

The other day we went to Red Lobster, actually it was last Saturday, and I was cool with going there but the second we got into the parking lot and I saw how full it was I kinda started feeling light headed and like my entire body had been thrown into a kiln. I don’t know what it is with me, I hate going places where there are lots of people. It’s really overwhelming. Sometimes I don’t care but then other times I can barely take it. I get this weird feeling like I am going to be walking into a place where everyone is just going to stare at me, I know it’s not the case and I know I am not so amazing that everyone is going to stare at me but it’s just how I feel. Like people are going to stare and judge me. Judge me for my wonky ass eyebrows and my flamboyant shoes.

I made these plain white converse way amazing and foxygreen worthy. I took my sharpies, which I have in every color imaginable, and went to town! I spent an hour on each shoe and I have had some good response from the public, well, from kids under 10 actually. I love getting attention from kids. Whenever I wore my kitty cat shoes I always got comments but most of them were from kids and nothing makes my day more than getting the attention of a highly imaginative and impressionable little person. I am living proof that you never have to grow up and be boring, grow up and be depressed maybe, but boring? NEVER!

I recently promised a friends kid that I would dress up like a transformer on his Birthday which happens to be next May. His dad looked at me all serious after I said I would dress up like a transformer and said “you know he’s really going to expect you to dress up like a transformer now” and to that I replied, “oh, I know”. Laycie make empty promises to a kid? no way dude.

I was looking through my flickr today trying to decide if I had way too many cat pictures and I came across this gem, oh it’s awesome! This was like 2004 and the situation was that I had bought a different cat litter because the store was out of mine and this other cat litter was NOT flushable so when I put a bunch of it into the toilet is just got all goopy and wouldn’t move, as clay would obviously do when dumped into a toilet. So I geared up and had to remove all the pissy-shitty wet clay from our toilet. viva el gato!

I just got an email that eBay is having free insertion on all auctions starting under $10 and it goes until September 30th!! I’m going to sell everything in my house! I have more than one eBay account though and the funny thing is that I only got this amazing message on the account I haven’t been using. eBay makes me laugh because they make so much money and all listings should always be free.

Lately I pretty much never know what day it is, seriously. It’s funny but also kind of stupid because knowing what day it is seems like the one thing everyone at any minute would know. I figured out what day today is because I saw the neighbor lady putting out her trash and I know that Wednesday is trash day so that makes today Wednesday. Which day of the month is another story…

So I put out the trash this morning and I had a hankering to get out the fancy camera and take some fabulous photos of my cats. I wouldn’t be the crazy cat lady if I didn’t do this. Those pictures are loading onto the computer right now as I write this, all 60+ of them.

It has been so beautiful the past few days and I have been outside almost the entire day both yesterday and the day before yet my skin isn’t getting any darker. it’s weird, you think I would have this super tan, but no, just a regular tan. I don’t want skin cancer or anything but I am enjoying the fact that I am not so pale people think I am ill. I have actually been asked why I am so pale before, like there is some pale disorder. Like I have an answer as to why my skin is so white, other than the fact that I AM a white person after all. Sometimes people ask the weirdest questions.

This one teacher I had in high school swore that I was sick and actually got my mom to make a doctors appointment for me to see if I had anything wrong. From that point on I just made sure to put blush on everyday.

So back to this tan thing, I happen to have the worst farmers tan ever in the world. I work outside in capri pants and a t-shirt and when I am bending down a lot the back of my shirt comes up and exposes my lower back, so I have a tan lower back, back of my neck, face and arms. Nothing else on me is tan but I think it’s funny.

I had this same tan like 2 years ago when we went to hawaii and in some of the pictures it looks like my lower back is dirty or something because it got so tan, it’s kinda gross when captured in a photo. As you can tell I am just waiting for my super amazing pictures to load, they take forever because I think the camera was set on super awesome was huge giant photo setting and each pic is like a mega bite.

I went running last night out on the Dallas hwy and I saw this sign in someones yard for college painters. I see these signs all over town in the summer but I’m not sure if they all say this: House Painting by Excellent College Students. hmmm. Okay, I want my house painted by an excellent painter, not some douche who gets straight A’s in college. I just thought it was a weird sign. They should re-word it: Excellent House Painting by College Students. Who wants the best brain surgeon in the world to do their dental work? Dental Work by Excellent Brain Surgeon!, umm no. What I want to know is if these students are so excellent then why are they not in summer school? Why are they letting their brains waste away by painting houses. I mean seriously, if you are excellent at something it pretty much means its the only thing you do. haha.

I know this because I am not excellent at anything, I am pretty good at a hand full of things but not excellent at any of them because I can’t buckle down and just do one thing. Being excellent at something is lame anyway, there is no room for improvement. I think the moment I became excellent at something I would just quit. I mean what do you do after you are excellent, become more excellenter? yeah I don’t think so.

Wow, my pics just got done and there are 92 of them! LOL 92 cat pictures. Let me take a break and see what a pretty good cat photographer I am.

Here is spunky being the punk she usually is:

Here is Peanutbutter:

Here’s Badger:

And lastly Badger talking to a dog:

I am selling some stuff on eBay and I just got a weird question. It is for a long sleeve gray shirt from american eagle and the person asked me where the logo is on the shirt. My first thought was, seriously?!?! seriously, you care about logos that much? but then I had another thought, maybe they don’t think its really from ae and that I’m lying or something. who knows. people are crazy and then there’s me with 4 cats and a camera in my yard on a early Wednesday morning.

Today is the 10 year anniversary of Michael and Laycie. I first met Michael in the 6th grade, he seemed like a cool kid and I liked him ever since I met him. I had a hard core crush on him for 2 years of high school before I got the nerve to make any effort to get his attention. I practically had to beat it into his head that I liked him but he figured it out and the rest is history.

I was just eating some cookie dough right now while at the same time trying to plug my camera into my computer and as I tried to do both of these things, dedicating one hand to each task, I realized that having just one hand would really suck. I mean, I already know that only having one hand would really suck, but it’s like I just got to experience it and now I really know that it would suck. I had cookie dough chunks in my one hand and with no safe place to set these chunks down I just had to eat them real fast so I could use both hands to plug my camera in. Cookie dough is good by the way.

I am posting this from my iPhone because I am waiting for kendel to get out of the dentist office, so as you read you picture me pecking away at my phone for many,many minutes.

Okay so today is going really good. I made an appointment with my doctor for my hand (I’ll talk about that in a sec) and to talk about my depression and stizzuf. The deal with my hand is that I have been using it a lot and its really stiff, swollen off and on, and my fingers keep going numb. My mom has rhuematoid arthritis and I’m afraid it’s starting to affect me too.

Kendel and I are just having a little day full of errands. Before her dentist appointment we went to my favorite thrift store, salvation army, and we found her one of thise glider-rocker chair things. It was so dope because we were going to spend the day looking for one and we found one right away. Yaay!

Okay, kendel’s done and its taco bell time!

My mornings always start out the same; I struggle to get out of bed, hobble to the bathroom and just as I’m shutting the door Blacky slips through at the last second. As I sit there she circles my feet crying and then . . . and then . . . achoo, she sneezes big boogers everywhere. I wipe them off the wall and she licks the residue off her face. Good morning!

So I’ve been trying to work hard all week and this hasn’t left me with too much time for my favorite tweezer activities which now include gray hair plucking in addition to the usual eyebrow plucking. That’s right, I have gray hairs and I pluck them, what’s wrong with that. I see it as a game of hand-eye coordination, can I get the gray hair without first pulling out three of my good hairs? It all boils down to the fact that I have nothing better to do than find things I can pluck out of my skin.

It’s Monday morning and it’s gray and rainy. Mondays usually suck anyway but this one especially sucks. Michael is at work so I kind of feel like I too should do something to bring some money into this household but I just don’t feel inspired to. I rather spend Michael’s hard earned money and go see a movie or something. This is straight up movie weather my friends.

Speaking of not being inspired, I am not inspired to do anything really. I’ve been working pretty hard getting the outside of this little house we live in looking nicer but I still don’t have the passion that I normally get when I do a project. I just keep going on this project because I want it to be over. It is looking pretty cool though.

I am also not inspired to run, or lift weights or anything that I used to really like doing. I wanted to do lots of cool things this summer and I haven’t done anything really. It’s like I have this pile of wood inside me just waiting to burn but I am just sitting here with a soaking wet box of matches and I just keep telling myself that soon it will stop raining and I can light the fire, when what I should really do is get out of the rain so the matches stop getting wet.

It’s hard to get out of the rain though, sometimes you think you’re out of it and then you look up and you are standing under the one hole in the ceiling and there you are soaked all over again.

I’ve been really tired lately. I’ve been sleeping enough but I just feel drained all day long. Maybe it’s my diet or something, too much sugar, who knows. One thing I do know is that this is not summer weather and I only feel like a few days have really qualified as summer weather and I am thoroughly disappointed with this summer.

Last week my Aunt Kay (who lives in Kodiak Alaska) came to my house. My sisters and I got to visit with her for a little while before she headed up to Seattle to have a surgery. I haven’t seen her since I was 15. Long freakin’ time. She was with her son Robbie and the whole reason they came to Salem was to pick up my mom. They brought my mom with them when they came here and just short of hanging a sign around my neck saying that I hated my mom, I tried to let it be known that I hated my mom. Being mean to your mom in front of other people feels weird. I hate my mom for many reasons but I also hate her for making other people think I am a bad daughter.

They (who are they?) say that the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. I have felt myself become indifferent to certain things in my life and I do feel slightly indifferent toward my mom but I don’t think I will ever stop hating her long enough to just be completely indifferent to her. She doesn’t affect me like I used to let her but that doesn’t mean that sometimes I avoid face to face encounters because I think I might actually physically harm her. She’s the most selfish person I have ever met and I find it ironic that she used to always tell me I was selfish.

It was cool to see my aunt but sad at the same time because she reminded me so much of my grandma. I loved my grandparents so much but it seems like that was another life or something, one where I had grandparents and seeing my aunt kinda brought me back to reality, it was like my grandma was sitting right there in front of me. I feel lucky that I got to have grandparents even if it was for a short time because some people I know never got to have grandparents. My mom mostly used our grandparents as a baby sitter which really meant I was the baby sitter but my sisters and I were just at a different house. I remember this one time my mom left us there for days and I could tell my grandparents were wondering if she was ever coming back.

I was always so concerned with my impact on everyone else when I was younger. I knew my mom didn’t have much money so I never asked for things and felt guilty when she spent money on me. When we were at our grandparents I tried my hardest to not be an inconvenience and to take care of my sisters because my grandparents were old, too old to have three kids to take care of. I don’t know why I was like this, I was always worrying about stuff. I kinda feel like all that worrying and stuff then has made me a different person now, like now that I am an adult I just want to worry about nothing and try to be a kid. I just want to play outside, eat junk food and run a muck.

Anyway, I always seem to float into the most random of topics. Badger just came in here and he is laying on my shoulder. I don’t think anything is as cool as being loved by an animal. Well, it’s cool when kids love you too, but animals have more of a choice. They can just run off at anytime and fend for themselves but when you open the front door and there they are waiting to come in and snuggle (after grabbing a bite to eat of course) it’s just the best thing ever.

With Spunky I feel like she loves me but it was less of a choice, the first four year of her life (she’s 6 now) she was indoor only and all she had was me. With Badger and Blacky I feel like they picked me, it feels good to be picked. viva el gato!