hey kids, its foxygreen here coming to ya from my fancy little iphone keyboard. I’m actually learning to use it quite well but it’s still a little difficult. I am pretty much in love with my phone but there are still times when I feel like it was a little to big of a leap for me. I mean, I went from a 5 year old nokia to this super sonic technotronic uber phone. I’m in awe of everything it can do.

So, as I’m sure you know, today is Monday. Mondays normally suck and the past few weeks of my life have actually felt like one long Monday. Today however did not feel like Monday; it felt like the first day of the rest of my life.

I know that tomorrow I might not feel this way but I’m hoping I do. Sometimes all we have is hope. I’m not sure what it was but I had an AWESOME day today. It’s weird too because several things happened, things that normally upset me, but i wasn’t phased. I think i might be back in the saddle again.

Last night I read 50 pages of the last harry potter book (thanks scott & lisa!) then i got up early and took a shower (i’ve been sleeping late every day) and then i went to go sit outside in the sun when I saw Lucky tied to the bumper of my sisters car and i decided to take him for a walk. These 3 things might have something to do with my magical day.

My magical day continued as I had a nice chat with Michael on my dog walk and surprised him because I was awake, haha. I even picked up dog crap with a silly smile on my face. After my walk I cleaned out a van we have, a van I have been using as a storage, so that we can sell it. Then i went to lunch at Lefty’s with a friend from school. All this happened before 1pm. THAT my friends is more than I have done in the last week.

As you can guess I continued to do things as the day went on. After lunch Kendel and I worked on the van some more and then at 2:30 we left for her doctor appt which went super. I thought she was close to delivery but she still has 4-5 weeks till baby Elianna is here. I’m super excited to be an aunt!

Okay, I am now on Michaels MacBook. Blogging from the phone is SO hard! I can’t type as fast as my thoughts flow and I can’t see what I’ve written, too bad so sad. Okay, back to telling you how wonderful and amazing and happy my day was. After the doctor I took my sister to take care of some crap with her foodstamps then we had to stop by and pick something up from my mom.

After all that Kendel and I came home and washed the outside of the van. I think that the key to my happiness is activity. The more nothing I do, the more depressed I get and the less I want to do something. The more I do things the more I want to do other things and the world is a bright and sunshiny place. Sunshine. That might be it too, we have been having crap weather and today on this sunny day I have an awesome day, hmm. I think the sun definitely affect my mood greatly.

And you want to know what finishes of my super amazing day of super amazing things? An invite to dinner and a movie tomorrow. Yeah today is pretty much the first day of the rest of my life. Yaay!

One more quick thing. I may be the crazy cat lady, but I love dogs too! Lucky isn’t my dog and I by no means have the means to take care of him but I have been having fun walking him, even with all the shit and all the jumping and all that. There is just something about walking around outside with a dog that is good for a persons well being. Okay, that’s it. Have a good day/night and thanks for reading :)

My sister Katie just got a dog about 3 weeks ago but since she is now homeless and sleeping in her car in my driveway I have convinced her to give him away. Here is the Craigslist ad for him. He is free to anyone I know or anyone you know so if you know someone that is looking for a dog you can just give me a call.

So yesterday I was hungry and I had the bright idea to get a chicken gordita supreme from Taco Bell and this might be the worst decision I have made in a really long time. What I am now experiencing can be diagnosed as nothing other than gut-rot. My stomach is attempting to leave my body because it fears I will again put disgusting food into it.

I’m not really sure if I already told y’all this or not and I rather not go back and read through my entries so if I already did forgive me. My sister Katie lost her job as apartment manager over at some shit hole on Silverton road, which means she lost her home and her job at the same time. Just about the most awesome thing that can happen to a person. ANYWAY, she is now kinda crashing in her car, lucky for her it’s a huge Expedition and lucky for me it’s in my driveway. Speaking of Lucky, she and her husband just got a dog and named it lucky but now they can’t really take care of him and he needs a new home, not that lucky for him. Talk about ironic.

In all seriousness though I feel real bad for my sister, I can’t imagine being in her position but again in all seriousness I am so amazing that there is no way I could ever in a million years be fired from any job. In a way this blog feels like my job, not like a job in a bad way but in a good way. I actually walk around in my miserabality all day long and my thoughts come to me in the form of blog posts but since my other sister Kendel lives on my couch (she actually does have a room here) and watches tv shows on my computer all day and I have failed to convince her how fun Nintendo is, I never get time on the computer.

I actually miss my computer now that I haven’t really been able to use it much. I am only able to use it right now because Michael is home and he can’t stand Kendel and I sitting on our butts all day watching shows so he tries to motivate us into doing productive things like re-arranging the living room and working on a household budget. I appreciate him trying to motivate me, I’m not really sure how else I will come out of my self pitying moaning, groaning, whining and feet dragging funk.

The other day I actually had an epiphany that I thought was going to bring me out of my miserableness but it lasted only 2 minutes. I was looking in the mirror at myself, which I normally do for hours on end just to pass the time, and I was talking to myself, in my own head of course. I said to myself in my head: Laycie, what are you so down for. You just got through a year of school, you have all this time on your hands to do amazing things and instead you just want to wallow in self pity all day. Then I responded to myself: No, I don’t want to wallow in self pity, I want to do amazing things, I am going to do amazing things! But then I woke up in the morning and again felt like there would be no more happiness in the world.

Foxygreen, she used to be so nerdy and fun but now she’s just lame and spun.

Happy Sunday night everyone, or whatever day/night this is for you. Whatever it is I hope it’s happy for ya. So… every Sunday I check out this site called postsecret. It’s a site where this guy posts up post cards that people have sent him with their secrets. I imagine someday to send a secret of my own but I probably never will. That sentence doesn’t seem right to me but I am going to leave it anyway. That’s what you get here, raw unedited Laycie.

Actually I do have to edit myself sometimes because I tend to get in moods where I like to rant about stuff like people kicking my seat in the movies or chewing gum in my ear but other times I get in moods where I just talk crazy talk and happy for you I am in the crazy talk mood almost every single day now.

I would love to share funny stories of my life with you but right now I am not going out much so this doesn’t really allow for any funny stories. I did take my sister to Walgreens last week where I sat in the car while she went inside and while I was sitting there in my beloved Jeep I saw an old woman who was wearing an outfit of all purple. Purple shoes, purple socks, purple shorts and a purple shirt. All different shades of purple, yet all purple. I wondered if someday this would be me but in shades of green. I took a picture of this amazing lady in purple with my phone but I am too lazy to plug my phone into my computer. sorry.

I went and saw the latest Harry Potter movie last week and it was awesome. I didn’t see it on the opening day which I thought I would but sadly I actually let that day go by unnoticed. Speaking of Harry Potter, we went to Borders late the other night and it was mass insanity. Kids all over dressed in cloaks and other costumes all waiting for the last Harry Potter book to go on sale at midnight. Again I was saddened by my lack of enthusiasm. I wished I was one of those kids just waiting to get my hands on the final book so I can see how it all ends. I don’t even have the book. Who knows when I’ll read it. Who knows when I will again love Harry.

Last summer I listened to all 6 Harry Potter books (yes I said listened) and it was awesome. I was sewing yet at the same time I was with Harry and the gang at Hogwarts. Books are just about the best thing ever in the world. I love escaping into a book and sadly enough (yes, another sad part of my life) I have barely read at all in the past 5 years. I have read text books, or rather skimmed them, but I haven’t escaped into a book in a long time. Escaping into Harry Potter’s world is something I recommend to anyone.

My shoulder has been hurting me quite a bit lately and besides the fact that every time I feel its pain I think about the day I foolishly drove into the path of a school bus, it is really starting to annoy me. Persistent pain annoys me. I am easily annoyed in life, it’s one of my amazing traits that I am ever so thankful for. Most things that annoy me I can walk away from, push out the front door or plug my ears to but pain, it’s not easily ignored.

I have a pretty high tolerance for pain, sometimes I even enjoy it– like I’m a better person for not bitching to the dentist that the dumb thing that makes your mouth stay open is pinching me, nope, not me… I just sit through the pain because I have issues… I know, this post is getting randomer by the second.

I have heard that tattoos are painful and this strikes my curiosity. I want to get a tattoo just to see what it feels like, so that I can judge the pain for myself. That and the fact that I want to cover my body in stars because I am awesome and all awesome people should get stars tattooed all over their body, just to let people know that they are awesome.

I have never really believed anyone about anything they said about pain since I got my first womanly exam. I was scared shitless because a few people told me it hurt and all this crap, but it didn’t. It didn’t hurt a single bit. Ever since then I have never believed anyone when they said something hurt.

You know how some people say that if we didn’t know sadness we could never know happiness. I think those people are full of shit.

Okay, so I had a MySpace page and even though it was pretty much the best page ever I decided to delete it. That’s right, I deleted my MySpace account and then I deleted my cat’s MySpace account too. Some may be surprised when then check their top friends and my awesome face isn’t there anymore but I have no regrets and no remorse over my hasty decision to cancel my MySpace account.

Don’t get me wrong, I am thankful that my little MySpace adventure got me back in touch with a few friends but my trip is over, there is nothing more MySpace can offer me. What was is that made me actually cancel my account? To your wonderment I offer these next few paragraphs:

First of all MySpace was like a high school reunion. So much so that I honestly think I am going to skip that shit. I suppose if you are doing amazing things it can be fun to get on there and show all the people who made your life hell that you in fact aren’t a welfare mother like they thought you’d be. But all in all who the hell cares what those ass holes think of you.

Another thing, the whole top friends thing is bullshit. Why would anyone want a wall in which they organize pictures of their friends faces in order of importance? And then who would invite all their friends over to see this wall? Ummm, no one because then you would just have to listen to your friends complain about why suzy and bob are higher on the list than them.

It’s not just your friends either, its you! You find yourself on your friends pages wondering why they too put suzy and bob ahead of you. You tell yourself it’s no big deal it’s just MySpace, and MySpace is just a dumb little website where people go to spy on everyone but it doesn’t matter.

Then there are the comments. People posting lame ass glittery pictures on your perfectly templated page?!?! who the hell do they think they are?!?! DELETE! Then you find people using your comment section to let everyone else know they hung out with you on Friday. Yeah they may be #4 but #1 wasn’t hanging out with you on Friday so they can suck a fat one.

Then you find yourself going to other peoples pages, reading the comments from their other friends. Friends you don’t know, tidbits of their life you were better off not knowing, then you’re checking their page out, wondering why they are so special to be above you on the friends list. They don’t seem that special, oh wait they have Jesus in their heroes section and you don’t!

Then you suddenly feel like you are just as bad as everyone else and maybe you too have posted just one comment too many and taken your place on their top friends list just a bit too seriously. MySpace is an evil, dirty bird and I am not longer having any part of it! I deleted my FaceBook account too just because I was so high off the joy of getting rid of MySpace.

I’ll have you know that tonight these blogs are coming to you from the dark and I in fact cannot see my keyboard. I am actually surprised that I can type at all but I am actually doing quite well. I may be the only computer science student who can in fact NOT type without looking at the keys but maybe all I have been needing is some good old fashioned blogging in the dark.

As most of you know I live in a little house which might be 700 square feet. maybe 650. Either way it’s 2 bedrooms and it was fine for Michael and I, but now we have my little sister here too so we are trying to do some reorganizing. First, everything I had in two bedrooms is now in one. It’s why I just have piles of stuff everywhere. I don’t know what to do with it yet.

Today we decided to try to make our house as nice as we possibly could and we had a super duper day of working and painting and nailing and all kinds of stuff. Michael found Kendel this cute little bed frame and so I set her up with some paint and she primed it and painted it all herself. Then she painted a few other things for me. At one point I was in the house looking out at her and I was like, wait. Who the hell is that out there??!?!

Ever since Kendel was a young little boo-boo (thats what we called her) she could never sit still for longer than a minute and the idea of her sitting in the yard for 4+ hours painting was something I never ever thought I would see in a million years. Kendel is like this completely different person. In the past few years I haven’t really been around her much for a million different reasons but this time I have with her right now I will cherish always.

I just can’t believe it though, Kendel seems SO different. Almost more different that you think could be possible. I am just so happy to have her around but I feel bad because I have been really depressed and I am trying so hard to pull myself out of it but I am having a hard time, Grrrr.

I admit that sometimes my nightly routine takes awhile but when I come out of the bathroom to everyone snoring I REALLY know that I take awhile. It’s a complicated process though, my nightly routine. I have to wash my face, brush my teeth, brush my retainer, do my proactive stuff, pluck my stray eyebrows and sit on the toilet playing with my iPhone for a bit. It’s quite the ordeal.

So I do all this to get ready for bed but when I’m done I am normally refreshed and want to do anything BUT go to bed. Tonight I decided that I would blog. So I go to disconnect my MacBook from our little entertainment center set up (my computer currently works full time to entertain my sister with movies and tv shows) and when I unplug the speakers they make this super loud static-high pitch-wake the dead sound that even makes me jump. I’m positive I woke Kendel up but at this point I think Michael is still snoring.

So I tip toe to the bedroom, crawl over Blacky and get situated to start my bliggity-blogging. I’ get all set to go then I decide I could write much better if I was listening to some music. I get back out of bed to grab some earbuds (Laycie keeps it real) when I realize while standing in the pitch dark that I have no clue where I would find any of these fancily named headphones. I have two iPods and an iPhone and all 3 came with a set of earbuds but do I know where any of them are? No. Not a single pair.

At this point I get annoyed with myself. What kind of person has no idea where her iPods are and why the hell do I not even know where my iPhone earbuds are?!?!?!? I haven’t even used them yet! I don’t need two iPods, look how I neglect them. I am a bad apple mother!
As I am thinking all this to myself I am rummaging through my piles of crap in hopes of feeling some cords that I think will lead me to a set of my cute white earbuds. I decide this isn’t going to work so I get my iPhone and push the button so the screen lights up and I shine it atop piles of random shit. No white cords.

I decide to go dig through Michaels work bag. No earbuds. I try to remember the last time I used my iPod, either of them, and I come up blank. I can’t even remember the last time I used an iPod, what is my world coming to?!?! I keep looking and I realize that Michaels work bag is my old school bag. I reach into the pocket where I used to keep my iPod and BINGO! earbuds!

I excitedly turn to go back to my spot in bed, which my laptop is keeping warm, when I kick a large furry thing across the room. Judging from the weight I know it’s either Spunky or Blacky. A quick hit of my iPhone button and the room lights up; I see Blacky there 4 feet away from me. Sorry girl but blogging is serious shit.

It has been so long since I have posted that I have spent days and days thinking of what I could write that would be worthy of such a long wait and the only thing I could come up with is just the same old crap.

As you all know I was trying to grow my eyebrows in a bit and one of them is coming along nicely but the other one is fighting the good fight and might be anorexic because it prefers to be small and skinny. This result saddens me because I was hoping to have a slightly better version of my perfectly plucked brows and right now I just look like I have no clue what I am doing with my tweezers. I imagine people stare at them wondering what in the hell I am thinking but then I remind myself what Michael always tries to remind me, what makes me think I am so special that everyone is looking at me? Besides the fact that I AM special, I’m not so sure.

My last post that you have had to stare at for way too long (yes I am so special that you come to my blog everyday to check for new posts) was about Blacky coming home. I am more than happy she is back but I have come to realize that the house is being taken over by fur. There is fur on everything. You think you’re safe when you grab a baby carrot from the fridge and put it to your mouth for a bite but you’re not. You are not safe. That cat hair is floating in the air and has special radar sensors to tell it when someone is going to eat something because it flies over and ends up in your mouth before the food ever does. Cats are the best though, they fill your heart with joy, your mouth with fur and your nose with the smell of fresh turds waiting to be scooped from the box because apparently the dirt outside is just too good to be shit on.

I also must tell you that I am not enjoying this sudden change in weather we are having. The sunshine was the one thing keeping me going and even that hasn’t been enough some days. But the rain? I can’t take it. It’s freakin’ July and I don’t want to be having anything to do with this crap weather. Ideally I would take it as a sign that I needed to be sitting on my ass doing absolutely nothing all day but since I have been doing that for 4 weeks now I think I don’t need the excuse.

Seriously though, I haven’t just been sitting on my ass but I haven’t been doing anything I had planned to do this summer either. Y’all know I’m a slight bit crazy and I’m down with that, it’s the truth and I don’t care but for the past few weeks I have been off the rocker 100%. Sometimes I am really good at not letting things get to me deep down. I let them get to me on the surface a lot but I try to keep things away from the core of my being, the center of my universe, the cupcake that beats inside of me. There are times though when my outer shell is a little beat up and weak, this is when things get to my cupcake.

So this cupcake I have inside of me, people are licking all the frosting off. My cupcake is turning into a muffin and THIS is not ok. I don’t want my cupcake to be a muffin, I am not down with that! I just want everyone to put their tongue back in their mouth and to stop licking the fucking frosting off my cupcake!